Many time in life I have felt a strangest pain inside my heart. A huge void, wanting to be fulfilled by something which I don’t know. I started filling it up with anything I could find. I used all my happiness... It went all in vain.. I used my tears, they couldn’t even soak it up. This undefined, unmanaged pain grew like anything till the time I slept under the shadows of meditating tree… And then it subdued for a while.. But promised to come back again… and soon…
And this phenomenon, I found in many other people.. In some or other way. Everyone suffers from this never ending vacuum coming every now and then. There are many times in everyone's life, when one seeks the true meaning of his life, his relations, his expectations and try to retrospect the way he has been living so far. This is a time, when we realize importance of some relationship, vagueness of some other ones. Some try to cover this vacuum by pretending(?) to be happy with friends all around. Some try to forget it in liquor, whims and fantasies and fool their own senses… But I am sure.. Everyone of us has got it.. Little or more…That’s why everybody seems to be searching for the happiness… Isn't it ?
While this inherent motivation to seek a source of happiness is as true as the source of the sorrow, or this vacuum, one may wonder why these things exists in our life in such a form. Why do we feel devoid of something..and entire life we spent in just a hope to find this thing back.. Why this game of loose and win and then loose again is played over and over.. Was God a fool to create this world with so much imperfection and then allow us to correct it ? Why weren't all of us equally happy, equally content and satisfied with each one's life and never try to interfere with each other, making this world a perfect heaven ?
Spiritual wisdom gives us the answer that world is imbalanced because it was supposed to evolve. Things don’t evolve when they are balanced. Its true, also in chemistry, where two radicals don’t interact if they are inert. Only active and oppositely charged radicals attract each other and try to become stable.. And more stable…until they find the perfect equilibrium. In the similar way, spiritual teaching compare the strong will power of God and Soul to meet with each other, causing all the activities of the world…
Coming back to the topic of seeking happiness once again, It seems that our goal of happiness is itself a mirage. Once we find our most sought source of happiness, we immediately start looking for the next. We never find contentment in the things which we were looking for, but still we keep looking. As one philosopher has truly said, "All that is achieved, has to be lost so that you can achieve the next thing." So we end up in an endless loop, looking for something, which we think will make us happy… Finding it.. Keeping it by side..and then again aspiring for the next… Wouldn’t it be worthy to say that we never know what we are looking for ? Or do we know it but just not yet ready to accept it, realize it?
